Though you didn’t sit down and plan it this way, you have a timeline. A start here date. There’s a post circling the internet talking about “if I’m not engaged by 25 I might as well give up” or “if I don’t get the stable job right out of college my entire plans change”. We have a countdown, a stop watch ticking that seems to get faster as each birthday passes. The dreaded “I’m 20 and I haven’t done anything with my life”.

People have been talking about this a lot in our generation, and we’re so stressed out about it that quarter life crisis is a coined term. We’re not 100% sure where our timeline came from or when it formed, but it’s there. So how do we deal with… not making it in time?

I was talking to a friend recently about how dangerous it is to set dates for yourself. I tried to explain that it was good for me because it gave me goals. It gave me things to work towards too. She shook her head, and said that putting end dates on your goals, just gave you disappointment. She was right.

How much time do we spend stressing out about not being far enough along? Goals are healthy, and we should always have set ones, but you have to give them room to change. One of the hardest lessons to learn is that even though you don’t get what you want you will get what you need. Life throws curve balls, and timelines are only helpful if life had a perfect pitch. Drop the dates, set goals in steps not big pictures, and remember that nothing is late, you don’t miss out on anything you’re supposed to have.