Coming to terms with Change.


I’ve always hated change. When I was a kid I got really upset when my mom rearranged the furniture in the den to create a different layout. I’ve always like consistency, maybe it’s because I am bipolar and I cling to stable and steady things to keep me grounded. But I don’t want to use that as an excuse, mainly because I refuse to let my emotional disorder control me, but also because it’s a lame reason.

Things change, you just have to accept it.

And I have- to a certain degree. I’ve at the very least accepted progress. I’ve accepted that my life will advance. Good change is welcome, sometimes it still gives me a pit in my stomach because it is unknown, but I don’t let it slow me down any.

It’s the bad and neutral change that gets me, the change that sneaks up when your not paying attention and you have to face the fact that you’ve just been hit over the head with something that will alter everything.

Yikes, even writing that made me whence.

It’s hard to accept that change, especially if you’re not one of those people who simply go with the flow. Maybe your more like me and the flow takes you kicking and screaming. I’m not judging you, I don’t think anyone likes getting knocked off their feet. It should trigger your fight or flight instincts.

So, how do you get accustomed to it? How do you become civil with change?

I think it really is an issue with control. When change is forced upon us we feel like we’re spinning out of control. We didn’t make the call, but the call is here to change our lives. It’s simply bigger than us, out of our hands. Learning to accept that is probably one of the harder lessons I’ll have to learn in this life.

Whether in your mind you’re handing over control to God, fate, or some other greater power is up to you, but handing over your control has to happen at sometime point or another. We have to submit to the fact that some things are simply out of our hands and we have to learn how to roll with the punches.

Part of that comes with learning that life cycles back around, and that if it’s bad now it’ll be good later (and vise versa) and that you simply have to hold on. Some of it comes with the fact that you’re a lot tougher than you think. You can stomach more than you realize. Your fear of the unknown or different is natural, but your ability to face it is too. You just have to force yourself to do so, over and over again. It’s like forming any good habit, you have to train yourself.

It’s not easy to give up control and let life happen to you, but it’s something that we must practice to get right. Next time a small change effects you, try and let it roll off your shoulders. Practice it more and more so when the big change happens you’re ready to face it, head on.

And perhaps a little head strong, too.

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