tick-born illness – Anna Down South

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Another Lyme Disease update?

I bet you thought after three years I might be done with it. That would be lucky, but I haven’t been that lucky as of yet.

The truth is I’m on what we’re hoping is our final stand with the disease. I’ve said that before, but I’m actually feeling optimistic about it this time. For the last five months I’ve been doing great on medication, almost feeling 100%. I was certain that it was the end and that I could go off them. But the second day off medications I felt terrible again- not to the same degree as when I was at my sickest, not even close- but enough that I felt extremely discouraged.

I’ve been on more natural medications lately, but about three weeks ago my doctor put me back on antibiotics for the final flush. We’re pulsing the medications, which gives the bacteria time to come out of the woodwork before we kill them all. Lyme goes into a biofilm, which is a dense layer around the bactira that keeps it safe from antibiotics. Pulsing the medication helps it dispose of that biofilm because it thinks it safe to grow and reproduce again.

The first pulse of antibiotics and I felt as terrible as I did when we pulsed my natural medications, which did not give me the warm-and-fuzzies. But then, we did it again.

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My doctor and I had a conversation the other day about my Lyme disease, and how I need to be prepared to be on some type of treatment for the rest of my life, even if it was something small, like a pill a day. He said that he’s pretty positive that he can get me to the point that I feel healthy again, but told me that Lyme bacteria often comes back, and consistently fighting it is probably the only way I can continue without a terrible relapse that takes me back to where I started.

Hearing something like that, even when you knew it was possible, kind of makes you step back. It makes you quiver for a second and thing, “oh, I’m never getting rid of this.” It makes you realize that your life will never go back to what it was before you got sick.

It’s disheartening to say the least, and it’s really easy to focus on that rather than to focus on the other part, the part where he said that he can get me to the point I feel healthy again even if I am on a small amount of treatment. It makes you overlook the word small in front of treatment. When I took a moment I realized that and when I did I tried to readjust my attitude. I’ve talked about my current relationship with Lyme before, about how I’ve made peace now that I’m well enough to live my life, but still am desperately wishing I could finish the process.

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